How to Get Rid of Unwanted Thoughts: and the Daily Mindfulness Habit

Everybody on the planet is subject to unwanted thoughts – No one is exempt. Understanding assaultive thoughts and how to deal with them is the key to living happy life. Unwanted thoughts and images distract us and lead us away from what we are purposed to do. Such thoughts, also create barriers in all our relationships. 

In this post, I want to share with you that When the thought enters your mind in the form of a suggestion urging you to do something negative in nature, you can either submit to that thought turning it into action, or you can ignore it. I have also created a YouTube video on this very subject, so check that out for more detail.

This is not the whole story but a snippet from my new book about Holistic Living, which features Mindfulness and issues around mental health. I am in the process of writing it. It will be published and made available to you later in the year – so keep a lookout for that! If you struggle to make self-care a priority or do not know how to start your mindfulness journey, check out my course, which will be available in the Summer of 2021- subscribe free to this blog to get updates on this! Regardless of where you are on your journey, I hope you will find something useful here- if so, please let me know down in the comments. 

Thoughts are Things.

Thoughts are things. They are as real as our actions are. Our thoughts create us to be who we are. Thoughts are like building blocks one piled on top of another creating and provoking actions, delivering results.

Because thoughts are things, we can choose whether we interact with them or not. Thoughts are not floating around in our head independently of our free will, on the contrary, our thoughts are under the command of our free will. Once we realise this, the thoughts and the distractions that assault us are much easier to control. But while we believe that our assaultive thoughts are almost disembodied things, and we cannot help thinking about what we do, we will never be able to be free or positively organise our thoughts.

To Interact- or Not

We must realise what thoughts are. We must realise that we can control them, indeed they are under our complete control. So, when a thought comes to you that is negative or destructive- don’t interact with it. That means that avoid rumination by thinking the thought – over and repeatedly as if it has some merit that must be considered. Assaultive negative and destructive thoughts have no merit at all, they will only bring you misery and uncertainty. So, the least interaction you make with those negative and destructive thoughts – the better.

By interacting with those thoughts, we are saying yes to those thoughts. We are giving consent to them to bombard us from the right, left and centre. By giving consent we are submitting our free will to those negative and destructive thoughts (now that’s a horrible thought!)

However, If we refuse to interact with those thoughts we are freeing ourselves from the power. Those thoughts are defeated, and we have the victory!

 However, if we entertain the thoughts and interact with them, it is us who becomes defeated, and it is the thoughts that have the victory over us! 

Sometimes we can feel that we are held hostage to our thoughts. At these times we feel that our mental wellbeing is under threat. At these times, we need evasive action to be able to quell those thoughts and take them under our control. The Bible calls it taking every thought captive. Once we do that, we are saying to our thoughts…

 ‘I am the boss you are not- I am control of my person you are not’! 

Of course, this takes time depending on how ingrained the habit of interacting with negative thoughts is. Be patient, take courage, and persevere, it will take time to learn your new habit of ignoring the negative destructive thoughts and replacing them with positive healing ones.

Obsession, Passion, Action. 

If we do not lay hold of these negative destructive thoughts at the interaction stage, then there is the danger that our thoughts will turn into an obsession, passion, and eventual action. 

Everybody on the planet is subject to bad thoughts – No one is exempt. Grabbing these thoughts before the interaction stage will help to ease the process of creating new and wonderful thought patterns. However, if we allow our thoughts to turn into actions they manipulate our lives to the point where we refuse to get rid of them. We say things like,

 “I can’t help it “, or “this is just who I am “. 

I’m sure that you can come up with many other little sayings that you have been guilty of in the past and I certainly have been. The problem is that by just accepting these thoughts they turn into negative and destructive habits. Not only does that affect our lives negatively but also those around us. 

Sometimes we entertain such thoughts because they become a source of strength and of power to us somehow. What we don’t realise, however, is that it’s not true strength, but a false sense of being in control. True strength gives rise to courage and true power leads to love. Anything opposite to that is something far more sinister.

The Daily Mindfulness Habit

Mindfulness is a wonderful way to conquer unwanted thoughts, particularly in the first stages when you feel overwhelmed with the negative assault of thoughts.

 In previous blogs, I have outlined different ways of becoming mindful in our everyday life so keep visiting back here because I will be posting more about how that can be achieved in various ways. 

Creating a good habit of mindfulness will help you to harness your thoughts and become a happier you.

It is helpful to Nip the thoughts in the bud before they do any damage. Mindfulness enables you to become self-aware, and that awareness is the underlying truth about yourself and who you are. Jesus says- you shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free. The truth only sets you free if you are willing to accept it and do something with it and only then it leads to your freedom. Becoming self-aware through daily mindfulness practices leads you to freedom little bit by little bit. Your mind will be set free, thus your lives free to be what we are meant to be and what we are supposed to do in this life.

Thoughts are things so pay those negative and destructive things no mind!

Thank you for visiting me here

I hope this post was helpful. If it was, I would love to hear from you. Feel free to contact me and share any thoughts you have. And if you enjoyed reading this blog, please support it by subscribing to my FREE newsletter and receive your FREE thankyou gift! 

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I look forward to your visit to my next blog post!

Paula Rose Parish


How a lifestyle Change can give you Courage or Break you – freedom from Over-Thinking

Mindfulness changes everything during a life change. Mindfulness taught me that my thoughts are not reality – they’re just thoughts. They’re passing mental activity. It’s what I do with them, or allow them to do is what counts. Harnessing your thoughts, especially when going through a huge life change- can change your life!

Do you spend much of your time overthinking things? Well, stop! You’re not doing much for your mental health, and you’re wasting your precious time and energy. Mindfulness helps us to stop over-thinking and cultivates balance and bliss. We become aware of our triggers and learn to pause so that we may respond, not react. Change is not always easy, especially unwelcome change. 

In this post I want to share with you how tour reaction to change can make you happy or unhappy. This is not the whole story but a snippet from my new book about Holistic Living which features mindfulness and issues around mental health. I am in process of writing it. It will be published and made available to you later in the year – so keep a look out for that!

 Change is all about us these days, and our reality is vastly different from a year ago. Suddenly we all have become very vulnerable. The world is experiencing an unprecedented catastrophe. Collectively, we weep and grieve. The worldwide pandemic of the Coronavirus (COVID-19) is still a reality for us all. This unforeseen disaster has swiftly taken the lives of loved ones, leaving the grieving disillusioned and struggling to make sense of it all. During the government-imposed lockdown, people lost livelihoods, assets, and social freedoms. The economy, families and marriages were all under great strain. People living together every day and night, with no respite, has caused domestic abuse to rise sharply across the world. Families lived in fear of loved ones who were meant to care for and protect them. Basic daily needs became increasingly challenging to meet, and many others became homeless. We stayed home to stay safe and protect the NHS while daily routines and lifestyles were turned upside down. Restricted freedom of movement caused much psychological strain, and people felt hemmed in. Sadly, for some, suicide was the only way out. Change and the losses incurred have been incalculable, unbearable, and extraordinary. Every human being on the planet shared a sense of unspeakable loss, collective grief, and we are left bereaved. Nothing will be the same again. What will your future look like?

Your reaction to Change can Make or Break you. 

Change changes everything. It can make you feel like you’re are trapped inside a tomb; at least it feels like it. I feel trapped, unable to find a way out. It’s dark, unwelcoming and very lonely. You feel that No one understands, and you can barely understand it yourself; all you know it hurts, you’re afraid, and you desperately want a way out. Can you relate? Change, mainly if it’s unwelcome, can make you feel broken.

However, Change can be a liberating, happy experience. It can usher in a planned adventure or an unexpected one. Even if it’s unwelcome, Change can open your world view and help you to grow as a person. How change affects you, depends entirely upon your mind set. Is your mindset- your outlook negative or positive?

What are you going to go for today – negative or positive ?

I want to live my life to the full, making it count for something positive. I want to help people and to do that, I must first learn how to help myself, then I have something positive to glean from to offer to others.

Your future begins in your thoughts, decisions, reactions, and actions. My passion for helping others in their well- being while making the Mind, Body. Spirit connection. As a person of faith, for me, it also begins with my faith in Christ.

We need to put first things first, so today, let’s deal with the Mind because that’s where our life structure is created. We care and maintain for our material possessions, but often we neglect to care for and maintain our mind’s health. Is your mind full of unruly thoughts, or are they ordered and functional?

 When we plan to take a journey of some kind, we take time to prepare. 

We are savvy travellers, so we ensure that we have our navigation tools in hand, ensuring that they work as they should. We then become familiar with them before we get on the road. The visit to the fuel station guarantees that we will complete our journey. If we don’t, there is a good chance of getting lost, taking a detour, or not getting to our intended destination at all. Now we have a goal, we have a plan, we are ready to begin our journey. Approach your thought life the same way. You want Change to MAKE you and not break you, and you need to gather your thoughts to decide where you want to go in your life’s journey.  

I am a child of the 50s and have seen a lot of life. I’ve lived and worked in four countries and visited a whole lot of others. I’ve experienced much tragedy, but also triumph, and a whole heap of self-growth. The journey through life, from the very beginning to end, make us who we are. One thing I know that when my thought life has been unruly it has bee detrimental to my whole being. The outcomes aren’t pretty and if one is wise, one does not want to repeat that experience.

An Unruly Thought life is Detrimental to your Health 

Dr Travis Bradberry, the co-author of the book Emotional Intelligence 2.0, points out that the average person has 70,000 thoughts each day, and if you don’t learn to organize them, they have the potential to wreak havoc on your productivity. I would add that they can wreak havoc with your life generally. When you succumb to unruly thoughts, your mind becomes disorganized, and the more you Over-Think, on intrusive thoughts, the more power you give them. The more power you give them, the more effects will manifest in your body, mind and Spirit- in other words, your whole life!

Dr Bradberry further points out that ……..

“In a recent study conducted at the National Institute on Aging, it was found that allowing your mind to be disorganized doesn’t just feel bad, it’s also actually bad for you. A disorganized mind leads to high stress, chronic negativity, and impulsivity. These states stifle productivity and contribute to a slew of health problems, including weight gain, heart disease, sleep problems, and migraine headaches.” (2015,

Do you want to happily live with those kinds of physical effects ?

If you don’t- then watch out for my next blog post, and I will give you a  Few tips on Structuring your thoughts to successful living.

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If you have found this article helpful, please Like, Comment, Follow and Share. If feel you would like further support, please contact me. Details of How to get in touch with me is found in the top menu on my home page.

If feel you would like further support, please contact me. Details of How to get in touch with me is found in the top menu on my home page.

 HEAD OVER TO YOU TUBE AND CATCH UP WITH MY VIDEOS and I see you in my next blog post!

Paula Rose Parish