John Lennon said – All ya need is Love- was he right?

Here I share with you a little excerpt from my book- Psalm 23 Unwrapped available at Amazon- I hope you enjoy it!

Connection and love

Psalm 23 is about our relationship with God. The author David knew that the Lord is his source as Shepherd and so would unconditionally supply his need. He does not want for anything because God has everything all sorted, he is the loving Shepherd, and he has got David’s back. David has all he needs from the Shepherd who meets those needs, and one of them is connection and love. Without good relationships, you cannot have this unconditional love. Relationships are the arteries that carry the healing balm of love because good relationships are the secret to a good life.

We need good relationships to be healthy and happy. In fact, research has also shown that babies fail to thrive, and sometimes die when they are not held and loved. This need is about belonging to a group or connecting with other people deeply. It is a social need we all have. That is why, during the isolation of COVID-19 lockdown, many are struggling.

We all need emotional relationships. Some of the relationships that satisfy this need include friends, workgroups, social groups, community groups, family, romantic relationships, churches, religious organizations, sports teams, and book clubs. For others, they find love, connection, and a sense of belonging in gangs, cults, etc. John Lennon sang- all you need in love. But we also need a deep sense of connection. Connection and love are shown through deep, enduring relationships with others. It is love from people who you know you can count on, no matter what happens, because they love you unconditionally.

Good relationships are channels that carry that kind of love. God also is a source of pure love channeling it to you if you will receive it. I am not sure that God created love because love just IS. God IS the essence of love. 

1 John 4:16 – We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love. God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them. 

Like many teenagers, and maybe like you, I looked for love and connection in all the wrong places and people. Then one day in 1976, I meet the Lord of love, and my empty, searching heart found peace. Love comes from God, who is its source, and since God is love then we, his followers who are born of God, will also love.

God loves us, so we must love one another. A true Christian, one saved by love and filled with God’s love, must live in love toward God and others. The entire passage found in 1 John 4:7-21 speaks of God’s loving nature. Love is not merely an attribute of God; it is part of his very soul. God is not only loving; at his core, he is love.

God alone loves in the completeness and perfection of love, fulfilling our inherent need to be loved and to love. The complete description of how we express true love towards fellow human beings is found in 1 Corinthians 13. This passage teaches us ‘how’ to belong in the right way.

 We need to feel that we belong somewhere, and to be connected to a group of like-minded people. Friends and family are a platform to give and receive love. We all have needs but they are fulfilled differently for each individual. Some people prefer one-on-one relationships. They feel stressed within groups but comfortable one-on-one. Other people are just the opposite; they like group relationships. Some people just love hanging out with all kinds of people. They have a higher need for visible relationships.

Part of the expression of love is empathy, approval, and acceptance. Some people have a much higher demand for these than others, and sometimes they are also more tactile.

All of us need touching and physical contact. A kindly ‘hug’ from a loved one goes a long way. If a small child spontaneously hugs you, then this is a sign that the child has a need to be tactile. It is a discerning parent that will regularly fulfil that need. If that need is met within the family, the child will not look elsewhere. The need for love and connection can also be met by volunteering in a nursery or orphanage, getting a pet, getting a massage, etc. Jobs, like nursing, are good jobs for tactile people.

At the level of human physiology, we are designed to need love. This is because God created us, who is love, and we are in his image. Hormones like the ‘feel-good hormone, are released when humans connect and touch. Human touch is so vital that brain development in children can be impaired without it.

How to Navigate Life as a Christian and Avoid unnecessary detours.

My parents told me that as a child, I never wanted help around the house, and I didn’t want my parents to help me either. In the 60s we had summer and winter school shoes. Our winter shoes had laces. I couldn’t manage to tie them myself, so I talked my big sister Susan into doing it for me. I could not figure out the pattern of movement to tie the laces, but apart from that, I tried to do most things by myself.

The task of learning was stressful for me, so I didn’t have the patience to accept instructions. I winged most things. Fake it till ya make it– I would say. It may have been that as an undiagnosed dyslexic, I found learning taxing. Maybe that is why I refused to follow instructions, perhaps I just couldn’t. I remember very clearly as a child trying to absorb instructions, and I would get very angry and agitated inside. I just could not understand the idea that was being conveyed to me.

All I wanted was to get whatever it was over and done with, I didn’t want to hear all of the ‘how’s to’s, so I became very impatient. Maybe it did have something to do with my dyslexia, or maybe it is more to do with a stubborn personality that resisted instruction. Some of us live our whole lives in a cycle of resistance. It becomes an ingrained habit where we react to everything that way, and when we eventually meet God, we resist his leading- I certainly did. 

Many of us don’t want to be patient and wait for God to lead us. Instead, we want to do it our way – right now! Were in a hurry, we want it all done yesterday. When in the throes of bereavement the first reaction may be-I want to get outta here – Now! You may want to be rid of the feeling of sadness as soon as possible, escaping from the feeling of shock and trauma. At these times, we can get agitated and get ourselves wound up, and fail to listen to good advice. Most of all, we fail to listen to God’s leading and counsel. Then when it all goes pear-shaped, we blame God or others.  

Any person that travels and uses a map knows the principle of learning from those who have gone before. Someone mapped a journey for the very first time so others could follow. It is the expertise of the map maker that guides us. When we are going through difficulty, we can get impatient, and we might rip the map up, we think we can make it to our intended destination without guidance. Without the guidance of the map, however, there is a chance that we will lose our way, and so it is with our lives. When we navigate the dark valley, we rely on the expertise of the map maker. God, the Shepherd, is our map maker.

With God’s guidance, we can avoid the detours that may be quite dangerous for us. Our Good Shepherd leads us, not because he wants to control us, but because he loves us. God our Shepherd leads us into the path of righteousness, the good and right path that will lead us forward out of the valley. 

Paula Rose has a Bachelor of Pastoral Counselling and Theology, Vision Christian University, USA Master of Arts In Counselling & Professional Development, specializing in Spiritual Abuse through The University of Derby, UK.

She Studies the BACP Life Coaching Course, Bristol, UK, and is a life member of (ISFP) The International Society of Female Professionals.

 Paula Rose Parish is a Pastor, Author, and founder, of Hope. Faith. Love, and Your Wellness Matters. She studied at the University of Derby and received a Master of Arts in Counselling in Professional Development. Over the years, Paula Rose has served as a pastor, chaplain, counsellor, and coach and taught at a Christian university. In addition, she has led workshops and retreats and spoken worldwide on Christian spirituality. 

Author of over 200 articles and two published books, Paula Rose, continues to write on the wellness of mind, body, and spirit. Paula Rose is adding a string to her bow and is presently reading Health and Wellness. She has four grown children, five grandchildren, and lives in South Wales, UK.

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Paula Rose is a Wellness Coach Ordained Minister, Speaker, Blogger, Podcaster, Course Creator, Published Author, and has a Master of Arts in Counselling. And many other qualifications and a lifetime, so I have heaps to share with you.

Paula is a life member of (ISFP) The International Society of Female Professionals.

 🖤Want to help support me as an author? Click here available now on Amazon ✔BOOKS BY PAULA available at AMAZON in the UK, USA, Aust; 📚Nothing Good about Grief: Path to recovery with Psalm 23 after COVID-19 & other losses. 📚Psalm 23 Unwrapped: Hope in difficult times.




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