How does Mindfulness and self-compassion blend together ?

Is self-compassion the latest meme? Well, maybe the term might be, but the ideas are as old and the bible itself. Mark 12:30-31 30 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. 31 The second is this: ‘Love your neighbour as yourself. There is no commandment greater than these.

Self-compassion has a similar history as mindfulness in that it has existed in Eastern philosophy for over 2,000 years, but it is a relatively new concept in Western research and practice.

WHAT IS SELF COMPASSION?

Self-compassion is showing yourself positive self-regard. This is interpreted as showing yourself kindness, self-care, and love. Common humanity involves feeling part of a more extensive human experience rather than living isolated and alone. Mindful awareness is used to view perceptions and emotions through an impartial, balanced perspective and not reactionary. 

ADVANTAGES OF SELF COMPASSION

Self-compassion enables you to be more resilient through difficult times, such as in times of failure, feeling inadequate, and feeling emotional pain and suffering. At these times, it is easy to get swept up in these difficulties and get a thing out of perspective. 

 Self-compassion has elements of emotional intelligence and has similar effects to self-esteem. Emotional intelligence embraces negative aspects of oneself, takes responsibility, and does not need to conceal painful truths from themselves to maintain positive self-regard. Therefore, self-compassionate people tend to be more aware and capable of tackling problems. Due to the constant demands of the physical and social environments that some people work in, the ability to address failings, be strong through difficulties, and improve oneself is a valuable skill set for anyone.

TWO PEAS IN A POD

Mindfulness and self-compassion fit together like two peas in a pod to cope with life stresses and make decisions. 

Although mindfulness and self-compassion are congruent and both the mind and heart produce behaviours, the two are still uniquely separate concepts. This is because mindfulness is concerned with the functions of “the mind,” and self-compassion is concerned with “the heart.” The heart and mind meet when mindfulness brings awareness, a nonjudging attitude, and reflection, while self-compassion is a caring guide for individuals to integrate needed personal changes while maintaining a positive attitude toward the self.

Sandy Newsome, PhD a staff psychologist at the Counselling Center at New Mexico State University, points out that the integration of mindfulness in relationship to self-compassion in research is in its infancy yet has promising potential.

A true leader brings their best selves to work every day. My new course will bring out the leader in you by learning to work through stressful situations. Find out how by signing up for my NEW Course is Live on Udemy. Mindfulness Masterclass for Stress Relief – click here for all the details. www.moonrosemindfulness.com

OR GO TO –  https://www.udemy.com/course/the-mindfulness-stress-relief-master-class/?referralCode=1FA203E550AC769AC33A

NEWS FLASH!! This year I will be offering my courses and books directly from my website- so keep a watch out for that!! 

Thank you for visiting me here; I hope this post was helpful to you. 

If it was, please follow this blog, you’ll find a button on the lower bottom right and leave a comment with any questions or prayer requests. 

Also, please sign up for my newsletter, where you will get great tips and deals to help you live life on purpose, mindfully achieving success and happiness for your mind, body, and soul. 

Virtual hugs, I look forward to your visit to my next blog post

 Paula Rose Parish

5 ways mindfulness improves decision making to enhance your business and your life.

I previously wrote an article about 8 tips to compassionate leadership and will link it for you HERE. https://wp.me/p9UfPQ-10o

In this smart guide, I will take it a step further, addressing mindfulness and self-compassion – after all, how on earth can we as leaders be compassionate towards others if we are not firstly compassionate toward ourselves?

This article aims to strengthen your skills to boost your best possible decision-making abilities to enhance your business and your life.

Mindfulness Awakens Compassion

In the first instance, let’s look at mindfulness in the context of decision making.

In concise terms, mindfulness has been defined as paying attention to purpose in the present moment. If you are paying attention, you will automatically become more compassionate to yourself and the people in your environment. 

Westernized mindfulness has yielded many positive findings, and practitioners, studies, and patients have been found to cope with pain, stress, emotional exhaustion, and other factors influencing stress and overall health as measured through various questionnaires and brain imaging scans. Further than having a broader awareness, mindful individuals are more creative and are more likely to find innovative solutions to complex problems. The studies have shown that mindfulness helps people handle multiple tasks more effectively, so we know that mindfulness is not just another new age scam but serious science! 

By being in a mindful state regarding decision making, you can see the depth of the issues you face more clearly and shift your attention more quickly to what is most needed. The ability to shift your attention quickly and respond suitably is essential to good decision making.

1.    It can be natural and automatic for us to pass judgment before we know the facts; however, this is not a process that leads to success. Mindfulness helps decision making by developing the ability to be non-judgmental of the inner experiences of oneself and others. Also, having the ability to disengage from initial thoughts and reactions allowing space and time for a full appraisal of the facts and different perceptions before a decision is reached.

2.    A lot of us go about our daily business mind-less-ley. Mindfulness helps decision making by developing observation by attending to sensations, thoughts, and feelings, creating an acute awareness of the self, others. We become more keenly aware of the environment and the developing changes, which gives us the stimulus to make the right decisions. 

3.    I am a procrastinator and have found that mindfulness helps decision making by giving us how to spring into action with awareness. The awareness of the details of one’s actions is an excellent plus because you are not overtaken by distractions but can remain focused.

4.    Mindfulness helps decision making by putting into thought-forms descriptions of what is really going on effectively. When you are mindful, you become aware of your thought process better and, therefore, develop the ability to correctly ascertain and convey core and peripheral observations.

5.    Being highly sensitive, most of my life, I had got into trouble by reacting to a situation immediately, and usually, it was to my detriment and of others. However, I have found that mindfulness helps decision making by giving you the ability to perceive your inner emotions and others without having to react to them – Knee jerk reactions are gone forever (that’s the goal)! 

I hope that these five reasons that mindfulness helps you to make good, solid decisions is a help to you. I am not implying that you will never make a wrong decision- of course, you will – you are only human after all! However, being mindful will significantly improve your chances of making stress-free choices that work to grow your business and your life!

A true leader brings their best selves to work every day. My new course will bring out the leader in you by learning to work through stressful situations. Find out how by sighing up for my NEW Course is Live on Udemy. Mindfulness Masterclass for Stress Relief – click here for all the details. www.moonrosemindfulness.com

OR GO TO – https://www.udemy.com/course/the-mindfulness-stress-relief-master-class/?referralCode=1FA203E550AC769AC33A

NEWS FLASH!!

This year I will be offering my courses and books

directly from my website- so keep a watch out for that!! 

Thank you for visiting me here; I hope this post was helpful to you. If it was, please follow this blog, you’ll find a button on the lower bottom right and leave a comment with any questions or prayer requests. 

Also, please sign up for my newsletter, where you will get great tips and deals to help you live life on purpose, mindfully achieving success and happiness for your mind, body, and soul. 

Virtual hugs, I look forward to your visit to my next blog post

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCvdQ4NPTNfXSnwd3pimPh0g

How to Reduce Your Stress

One of the blights of humanity is frustration. We get frustrated when we don’t get what we want or what we think we deserve. It seems that we’re a living contradiction. We really are our own worst enemy, working at cross purposes against our own best interest. We want meaning, purpose, and peace of mind, but we aren’t ready to strive or sacrifice for it. Why? Because human beings are forever seeking that kind of thing through enjoyment, which is temporal by nature. 

 Pleasure is a good thing, and we need to have some fun; however, it’s not the be-all, end-all that we imagine it to be, and we become disappointed with our life and can’t put our finger on why. Maybe it’s about expectations, and when those expectations are not met, we become very disappointed. For example, when we are having fun, and the pleasure we feel comes to an end, we want to chase after it, trying to create familiar feelings of joy. Sometimes we try to recreate experiences at a considerable cost to ourselves; we try to convert pleasure into something permanent.

When life goes wrong, we try to fix it by increasing the feel-good factor and strive to make it stay with us, but we just can’t do it. When we are frustrated, we search for ways to make ourselves happy, and often unwisely so. No matter how hard we try, we cannot make what is temporary permanent, and we cannot make what is imagined real. We can’t get back our loved one who is gone, the job that fell through our fingers is in the past, or even the children who have become adults and now live their own lives many miles from us. Also, it’s worth noting here that the COVID-19 pandemic has taken its devastating toll, and we will never get back what we lost.  

Several hundred years ago, along with other religions, Christianity began engaging the West in Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction. Although it was not named as such, that is precisely what it is, the aim and objective and results being the same. Within the act mindfulness practice, if one removes the idea of God, it still works. However, I prefer to still relate to God as far as mindfulness goes because it enhances not only my mind and body but also my spiritual person.

The scientific evidence to date of the success of mindfulness to enhance human life is overwhelming, and for those interested in their wellness, we cannot ignore it. Various professional disciplines and social movements, such as medicine and health care, psychology and brain science, and education at all levels, the law, business, leadership, and much more, enhance their practice by inserting mindfulness.

 Today’s mainstream medicine is developing an ever-growing interest in mindfulness-based intervention, such as Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT). Mindfulness is something we can practice for peace of mind and a way of relieving a wide range of chronic medical conditions. It is much like snowmelt flowing inevitably downhill from a high mountain source, flowing around obstacles, finding many pathways under the gentle tug of gravity, and ultimately merging into major rivers systems. The gravitational pull is the promise of liberation from suffering and the potential safe harbour. As human beings prepare for the awakening and embodying of wellbeing, greater wisdom and wise action in the conduct of our individual lives so we may peacefully carry ourselves in the world as a species. In other words, mindfulness can become a normal and natural way to live your life, and the feeling of wellbeing is inevitable. Living a mindful life as Jesus Christ did would not end our frustrations but the beginning of successfully managing them. 

Jesus gave us the answer to our frustrations and said don’t chase after things that are here today and gone tomorrow, but rather, strive for eternal things. Eternal things are more satisfying, like top quality peace, joy, and love, that only God can supply. Mindfulness can help us to pursue eternal things naturally and consistently.

Trying to hold onto relationships or things that are gone will leave you frustrated and keep you grieving for as long as you hold onto them. All human relationships, albeit long term, are temporal and subject to the joys and pains of this life; our lives are so fragile and short. The only permanent relationship and forever is a relationship with God offers to us through Jesus Christ.  

The nature of my work is that I aim to empower others with education and motivation to help them make for themselves a purposeful and happy life. In addition, I enjoy helping others to set wellness goals and then provide resources, helping you determine which changes would make the most significant impact on your health.

Thank you for visiting me here; I hope this post was helpful. 

If it was, please follow this blog, you’ll find a button on the lower bottom right and leave a comment with any questions or prayer requests

CLICK ON LINK BELOW FOR details of my Stress Relief Master Class. 

Remember to Live Life on Purpose

Virtual hugs, I look forward to your visit to my next blog post.

 Paula Rose Parish💗

https://www.udemy.com/course/the-mindfulness-stress-relief-master-class/?referralCode=1FA203E550AC769AC33A

How the weak and the strong are equally loved by God.

Have you ever been in a situation that you believe is so unfair? I can tell you many stories that I feel I have been mistreated or a situation happened that just wasn’t fair! I am sure you can recall many situations that have been unfair to you.

Matthew 21:1- 16 is a parable that teaches around issues of unfairness and fairness. However, it is not a factual story and revolves around the equal rewards given to workers in the vineyard for unequal amounts of labour.

In the context of the Gospel of Matthew, Jesus uses various events to communicate his vision of what the kingdom of heaven should be on earth, as it already is in heaven. And not surprisingly, it differs from many existing ideas of it. Jesus says the last will be; first, the first will be last

Just before this parable, Jesus accepts the children, blesses them, and uses them as a model for how the kingdom is granted equally by grace and God’s mercy alone. 

Then in the encounter with the rich young ruler, he indicates that it is almost impossible for anyone to be worthy of the kingdom based on their own actions, showing that only by God’s grace and mercy alone can we enter God’s kingdom.

Firstly, 

This story is about a farmer who hires workers at regular intervals right through the day, from sunrise at three-hour intervals to the ninth hour, which is mid-afternoon. 

Casual labourers are called together at the end of the day, beginning with the last hired. They receive a day’s wage, a denarius, considered enough to live on for just one day. Here, the farmer pays the last ones first and the first ones last, and all receive the same amount. So those who worked 10 hours got the same reward as the one who worked one hour! The workers who have worked all day are agitated, and so they should be – we say. They were so upset by this apparent unfairness that they were outraged.

Jesus has a way of using outrageous scenarios in his stories. It upsets the hearers; it unsettles us, challenging our comfortable traditional ideas. Jesus uses shock tactics to get people thinking, and his storytelling turns what we consider typical values upside down. 

At first glance, the scene is one of exploitation based on a whim and injustice. It’s not fair! Yet, the story opens new mental pictures for us to what the kingdom is like in heaven and should be on earth.

Secondly, 

However, if we look at it this way, unemployment benefits were created to ensure that everyone has enough to live on in the short term without working for it. Likewise, the National Health Service in the UK provides medical care for free to all people regardless of income. This is assessed not by no earning ability but on need. Here, the standard is needed and not on earning rights, which is how the kingdom is. Jesus promises in earlier parts of Matthew that he will supply all our needs according to his riches in glory and not according to our income. So here again, it’s not according to on earning rights, but on need. This is an upside-down kingdom for sure, one that should be reflected in the life of the Church. To accept this different way of thinking puts the question of justice into perspective for us today. 

Interestingly, Jesus uses familiar imagery, familiar even to us some 2,000 years later. The images are of hiring people who wait about the town centre for work. We get the image of desperate people, local people battling unemployment, looking for just one day’s wage to feed themselves and their families. Things aren’t looking good for them. These are poor people, you may have been in this position at some time in your life like I have. 

Hanging out about the town centre waiting for work is humiliating because they are at the beck and call of other people’s whim. There is a vast potential of being exploited as an expendable resource. The poor are dehumanised in their poverty, and this to Jesus’ thinking is unjust – they are in need and should be offered compassion, not exploitation. 

    Thirdly,

There is a familiar cry today for human rights. Some shout the loudest demanding their rights to be accommodated, while others do not shout the loudest or cannot shout, so they are marginalised, and their human rights are denied.

Through this story, Jesus is showing us that there are no favourites with God. The weak and the strong are equally loved and shown God’s mercy. 

I believe that this is a story about what our earthly reality should look like, focusing on issues around equality rather than justice because, without equality, we can have no true justice. But, it is also about what our spiritual reality should look like. What do I mean? 

Well, those who have accepted Christ’s saving grace early in their lives and have lived 70 or more years following him will have no particular advantage over those who have lived an unrighteous life but repents on their deathbed. But, nevertheless, they will have the same gift of salvation, although differing eternal rewards.

Far from exploiting anyone, God’s kingdom brings love and mercy, equality and justice based on the need for a saviour, the need to be saved from the power of sin and death, and not based on our own ability or status. Equality in God’s kingdom because should reflect what is happing in heaven. 

And for us, it’s the upside-down kingdom. So God is actually saying that our human way is upside down, and God’s way is the right side up!

  The Challenge 

Jesus is challenging our long-held ideas of what society should be and is creating the idea of a new society called the kingdom of God. In so doing, God is showing us in picture form, through this parable of what God’s kingdom should look like here on earth, indeed in our day-to-day living. 

This parable can unsettle us and raises a lot of questions because this is what Jesus wants, to unsettle us, and when we are unsettled, we are more likely to listen to the alternative. 

Jesus uses this story to show us what the kingdom of God is like, and within that, what God’s mercy, equality, love and what true justice is.

In Jesus, we are learning that God is not working with purely human rights, but simply that Father God loves us all equally without prejudice; this is at the heart of God. It is in God’s very being because God IS love!

the last will be first, the first will be last

And that is a challenge for us all to do likewise.

Thank you for visiting me here; I hope this post was helpful.

If it was, please follow this blog you’ll find a button on the lower bottom right and leave a comment with any questions or prayer requests. Also head over to my other blog www.moonrosemindfulnes.com for lifestyle tips and details of my Course.  

I blog three times a week, so you won’t have to wait long- so keep an eye out for it. Please press that FOLLOW button on the lower right or you’ll also find it in the BLOG section found on the menu. This will ensure you’ll get all my latest articles in your in box.

Remember to Live Life on Purpose

Virtual hugs, I look forward to your visit to my next blog post

 Paula Rose Parish💕

Women- Exploitation, Manipulation or Taken Advantage of by Workmen?

I am tired of being taken advantage of. I know men get taken advantage of what in the world of work I think women, particularly taken advantage , get taken advantage of much more. 

At this time of writing, I am waiting for workers to refurb my bathroom and install the new one. This guy has cancelled me several times, and I understood because we are coming out of COVID-19 lockdown is and trying to get work people to try to come to do work is difficult because many of them are book up six months of the head trying to cope with the backlog of work. So, I understand that and being very patient. But this guy had promised me that he would come this morning and I had not heard from them yesterday. I have texted him and phoned him, and left a message. He was not available on the phone, and for an hour or so, I have not heard from him. Given that all my dealings with him, he has answered the phone immediately I’ve never left a message, and my text message has always been answered within 10 minutes, but this morning it’s different. I sourced this guy through a reputable online platform, so they are vetted, so I’m presuming that this guy is reputable.

 In South Wales UK, it is common practice that when you employ someone with hundreds and perhaps thousands of pounds worth of materials to purchase, you will pay the sum of the materials upfront. Then the person can purchase your materials, and then on completion, you paid for the other half of the materials and the work done. So, I have paid him for some of the materials, and I am still waiting for him to contact me. 

 TWO WEEKS LATER 

Writing this paragraph, it is now a few weeks since I last wrote that last paragraph, and the work has started, but he is extremely slow and doesn’t turn up every day. Nor does he turn up on the time he says he will be here. He doesn’t seem to care about being paid; I bet if I were a man, the work would have been done by now!

I have many friends who are single women, some the result of widowhood, others divorce and one friend that has never been married. Speaking to these women, I hear the same story echoed time and again. The stories are distressing, and it makes me angry that they have been taken advantage of by workmen time and gain. 

Whether it’s mechanics, decorators, handymen, or builders, this seems to be a common thread that these men think women don’t know what is going on. Therefore they can be taken advantage of either momentarily or messed around with times and appointments like I am today. Workers performing shoddy work for women is quite common, and I have experienced that recently myself. 

A few years ago now, I bought a rundown cottage which is 100 years old. So, you can imagine the renovations and repairs that need to be done. The back garden or the yard, which is only very small, had a big stone shed upon it that was dilapidated and leaking water, so I employed a couple of guys to pull it down and take away the rubble.

 That was 18 months ago. It costs a lot of money, and it’s taken me this long to be able to renovate the backyard. I have a friend who is also a single woman, and she uses a particular handyman who happened to be a carpenter. So I employed him to build a back fence to cover the old stone walls falling the dilapidated and quite disgusting and needed to be hidden. I also asked him to cement the yard because the old stone shed coming down the ground was exceptionally even and broken up. He duly cemented the area that I wanted him to, but it didn’t quite look right, but not knowing anything about cement, I thought that it might drive the next day fine. It didn’t. It had big deep grooves and troughs in them, and I wanted a smooth service surface. It was apparent he didn’t trowel it smooth! At least that’s what I thought I was paying for.

I missed the cement by hand, which was a true feat, and I have lost partial use of my right arm due to an injured shoulder in an accident. But I prayed for God’s strength, and my Lord indeed came to the rescue, and my shoulder held out Okay. So, I learnt how to use cement and cover it up with a fresh layer. It still doesn’t look smooth but certainly looks better than it did! The project has cost me more money than I budgeted for, and I had to take out a bank loan. 

I am so sick of been taken advantage of that I have. I decided that I would learn all I can do what I can as my disabilities allow. One could take a builder to the small claims court. But there are costs to pay upfront, and the time’s ad stress to see the process through is considerable. Therefore, many, including me, usually don’t take that route to sort out these difficulties. 

I don’t’ know if this article is very different than I usually write, but I want to share my real-life difficulties with you. It may resonate with one of you. If you have had a similar happening, please comment below or email me as I would love to hear how you have dealt with it.

On an Another Note ………..

 NEW Course is going Live on Udemy on July 30th 2021. Beginners Mindfulness Masterclass for Stress Relief. 

The Mindfulness Stress Relief Master Class is designed for newbies to Mindfulness or anyone interested in learning self-awareness and improving well-being and personal growth. It will teach you How Mindfulness is used when you are feeling stressed. This course is suitable if you want to learn how to relieve your stress in a simple, practical, and fun way.

Hello! my name is Paula Rose Parish MA. my main focus is teaching Mindfulness and also advocates Holistic Living for the well-being of Mind, Body and Spirit. I love the great outdoors, crafting, my dogs, and writing, and family.

If you feel stressed or are a hyper-focused, motivated achiever, then I know you can successfully apply yourself to create a better balance in your life with Mindfulness. At times, life sucks and isn’t fair or kind. However, there is hope on the horizon. Mindfulness is a beautiful tool to help you to succeed on your journey. However, to live mindfully, you must develop what I call- Well-Habits.

The key learning points include:

· Origins of Mindfulness and why it works as it does.

· Understanding what harmful stress is and how to self-regulate it to find relief.

· Learning the triggers to stress to be better able to respond to challenging situations rather than react.

· Recognising patterns of worrying or self-criticism that often generate more stress.

· Developing practical self-care tools to help you thrive, perform at your best, and build resilience.

Course Materials

· PDF will cover the theory of each session and provide details of the home practice.

· PowerPoint slides to guide you through the course.

· Video lectures

· End of module quizzes

· 12-month Free Membership Access to my new Blog moonrosemindfulness.com for continual learning.

Thank you for visiting me here; I hope this post was helpful. If it was, please subscribe, or leave a comment with any questions!

 If you feel you would like further support, please contact me. Details of How to get in touch with me are found in my home page’s top menu.

 HEAD OVER TO YOUTUBE AND CATCH UP WITH MY VIDEOS – it is Free! 

Virtual hugs, I look forward to your visit to my next blog post!

Paula Rose Parish

Mindfulness is NOT a religion – BUT is a skill that can be easily learned and practiced daily.

Our human existence does not allow us to live completely stress-free. Mindfulness will help you with the stresses of life and help you to find relief safely and naturally. Mindfulness is not a religious practice but a skill, that with enough practice can become second nature. In daily life, it can be as simple as noticing the shapes of the clouds or counting your breaths, learning to observe the thoughts that come into your mind and letting them go. This trains you to be present in the moment. recognise your thoughts but realise what is at hand. This can be done anywhere, at the beach, on the commute to work or even in the bathroom.

 To function independently in this life, you need to be well. Wellness is a big, important goal; however, it can feel overwhelming at times. 

 The busyness of life can make it hard for you to prioritise self-care. The more you think about what you “should” be doing differently, the more daunting wellness can seem. Holistic health is about taking responsibility for your own health. Mindfulness helps you to get there. 

If you are doing something destructive to your healthy- being, recognise it for what it is, and endeavour to replace it with healthier habits of mind, body, and spirit.

So, what is holistic health and wellbeing? It’s about honouring the mind-body connection and treating the whole person as the precious gift it is. 

Mindfulness and Holistic Living

The way you live significantly affects your mind and vice versa. So, to think about Mindfulness, one must also look at the way they are living. Mindfulness means being more intentional in your choices of good habits. As I have pointed out in my past blogs and books, there are also many additional physical and emotional benefits to a mindfulness lifestyle.

Mindfulness is so easy to implement. It is low cost, can be practised anywhere, and only requires your time and consistency.

Despite the ease of implementing Mindfulness, like any new habit, it can be overwhelming for beginners. Where should you start? Should you implement a daily meditation session, mindful eating, mindful exercise, or mindful walking? The answer is you should start small.

The Daily Mindfulness Habit

The detail of creating well-habits is dealt with in another lecture. However, Mindfulness is a beautiful way to conquer thoughts that produce stress, particularly in the first stages when you feel overwhelmed with the damaging assault of thoughts.

 Mindfulness enables you to become self-aware, and that awareness is the underlying truth about yourself and who you are. Jesus says- you shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free. The truth only sets you free if you are willing to accept it and do something with it, and only then it leads to your freedom. Becoming self-aware through daily mindfulness practices leads you to freedom little bit by little bit. Your mind will be set free, thus your lives free to be what we are meant to be and what we are supposed to do in this life.

Mindful means being more intentional in your day-to-day choices, benefitting your physical and emotional wellbeing.

Scientific Research shows that the Mindfulness habit has shown to: 

· Reduce rumination and overthinking. 

· Decrease stress by lowering levels of the stress hormone cortisol. 

· Improve memory, concentration, and performance. 

· Help maintains emotional stability. Improve relationship happiness. 

· Reduce symptoms of anxiety and depression. Improve sleep.

· protect against mental illness. Provide pain relief. 

· With the repetition of mindfulness activities, you will create fundamental brain function and structure changes. 

· Just as exercise habits will change your body, mindfulness habits will reshape your mind. 

If you are interested to learn how to care for yourself mindfully, purchase my new course at a special discount launch price in Late July 2021 on Udemy. 

If you want some ideas and tools to how to get relief from stress or do not know how to start your holistic journey, check out the course – subscribe free to this blog to get updates on this!

I am a Professionally trained with a Master of Arts in Counselling in Professional Development and Coaching, With over 40 years of experience, I will support you to maximize your full potential. You will identify your goals and receive balanced teaching, great tips, guidance and encouragement, throughout your journey to becoming a better version of yourself. Let’s Talk – contact me, and see what the next step is right for you! 

If you have found this article helpful, please visit my website- address below, SUBSCIBE, Comment, Follow and Share. If you feel you would like further support, please contact me. 

My Blog posts are for your encouragement.

Thank you for reading this newsletter, and I see you in my next time!

Paula Rose Parish

3 Strategies to help you to recover from burn out syndrome

In my last post, I shared with you to Adopt the three “R” Recognize, Reverse, Resilience approach to get through and recover from Burn out Syndrome.

In this post, I will expand on the three “R’s” and share how I apply them in my life. 

Recognize. This means to watch for the warning signs of burnout in yourself. Be self-aware. Negative, toxic thoughts will burn you out, wear you down, making you feel dry and stale as a dessert. The best I can, I slow down and listen to my thoughts as if they are words that I am speaking out loud. I stop and repeat my thoughts -out loud- to myself to determine if they are helpful or toxic. If they are toxic thoughts, I ignore them (one of my past blog posts goes into details about this). I do not give them fuel by going over them or even considering their meaning. If I am struggling with this, I listen to positive affirmations, usually from YouTube, to help me focus on positive thoughts.  

I also try to recognise the kind of words, I speak to others. I determine if they are negative or toxic and choose more positive ones. To share one’s heart and pour out your fear and hurt to a counsellor, coach or friend is Ok and much needed. I am talking about here, the normal everyday conversation that I may have that brings me down and make me feel burnt out. Recognise any alienation for withdrawal from work-related activities or at home. If you are experiencing burnout, you may view your job or home life as increasingly stressful and frustrating. You may even grow cynical about your working/living conditions and with people. Recognise if you begin to feel emotional distance and begin to feel numb about life in general. Recognise any physical symptoms like chronic stress that may lead to physical symptoms, like headaches and stomach-aches or intestinal issues. Admit when you are emotionally exhausted. Leaving you feeling drained, unable to cope, with lack of energy. Recognise your reduced performance and stop pushing yourself. Burnout mainly affects everyday tasks. When once the tasks were pleasurable and doable- now they are insurmountable as mountains! Individuals with burnout feel negative about the simplest of tasks, having much difficulty concentrating. If you are creative, then that will slowly drain away as well and no new ideas will be firth coming.

So if you recognise burnout syndrome in your self, the next step is to…….

Reverse and undo the damage by seeking support and managing stress- this is what we are doing here now. If you feel you would like further support through counselling or coaching, please contact me. Details of How to get in touch with me is found in the top menu on my home page.

To reverse the cycle of Burnout the next step is to develop………

Resilience which is the key to staying free from burnout. Gain confidence in yourself by learning to recognize and appreciate your resilience. You have it- I know you Do! Build your resilience to stress by taking care of your physical and emotional health. Learn something new every day about yourself and how to deal with burnout. The internet is awash with wonderful information with all things to do with mental health. Take time out every 45 mins-60 mins to give your mind a rest and make your body move and nurture your spirit. 

MINDFULNESS

I offer my clients Mindfulness Solution-based therapy that helps with developing personal resilience. Sometimes people who are working through tough situations just need to be reminded of how strong they really are. This method of therapy focuses on your strengths instead of your weaknesses by reminding you to think of and appreciate how you cope with your difficulties, by asking questions like …..

“What did I do to prevent things from becoming worse?”

Resilience is the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties. It is a particular inner strength that we all have to some sort of measure and you can learn to strengthen it. Resilience is characterized by those who persevere under the most difficult circumstances.

Be mindful of your accomplishments. If you are like me, as a perfectionist we can be very hard on ourselves. To help me with this, I keep a daily record of the tasks that I have done because I sometimes have the feeling that I have not accomplished a lot. So it is a reminder to me of exactly what I did do. I am also mindful how resilient I was to any challenge  that I faced during the day. I also write down what I  did to meet that challenge, and record my strengths and how overcame the problem and  I felt about it. I have found has helped me, and maybe of help to you as well. Reward yourself, you di well- and give yourself a break!

Thank you for visiting me here

I hope this post was helpful. If it was, I would love to hear from you. Feel free to contact me and share any thoughts you have. And if you enjoyed reading this blog, please support it by subscribing to my FREE newsletter and receive your FREE thankyou gift!

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I look forward to your visit to my next blog post!

Paula Rose Parish

How I use Colouring for the healing of worries, loss, and past hurts.

In my past posts, I have outlined many aspects of holistic living, and one of them is mindfulness. Our minds are influential indeed, that will lead to our success or failure; so I feel, its important to become more familiar with the concept of mindfulness. In this post I want to share with you how I use colouring to help me through the overwhelm that each day can bring. This is not the whole story but a snippet from my new book about Holistic Living which features mindfulness. I am in process of writing it and will published and made available  to you later in the year – so keep a look out for that!

At first glance, mindfulness can look like just another hobby that people have caught on, much like meditation, yoga, or pottery. However, I have found that is not the case. When I initially came into holistic living, I promised myself that I would practice it daily. In my next post, I share with you how to make mindfulness a well-habit, but for now, in this post, I want to chat about How I use Colouring for healing of worries, loss, and past hurts. However, This is a short post and not the whole story but a snippet from my new book about Holistic Living that I am writing and will be published and available to you later in the year. 

As time goes by, I am learning to develop the mindful habit of Colouring and incorporate this mindfulness practice into my life. My friends and family thought I had discovered a new hobby to pass the time. However, I didn’t really know how to answer them and then, after a lot of research and reflection, I now know how to explain it, and it goes something like this …….. Mindfulness is not a hobby but something far more meaningful – It is a daily practice and a way of life.

 Having said that, hobbies do, however, come into play here. Although mindfulness is not a hobby in itself, hobbies can develop mindfulness in your life.

Mindfulness is the practice of observing yourself, others, and the environment without judgment. Mindfulness teaches us how to value our time by turning any moment into a present moment. The result of mindfulness practice is thinking objectively while being totally focused and present in the current moment. Your mind becomes relaxed and yet very aware. Your thoughts are focused and become more precise. Your body is relaxed as it receives calmness, peace and bliss state from your mind. 

Colouring for Healing 

There is a saying that depression is about the past and anxiety is about the future. If you ruminate about the past, constantly re-living hurts and regrets, you will become depressed and stressed! If your mind constantly goes to the land of “what if? or If only!” churning the things that could go wrong around in your head and probably will go wrong, you will become anxious, and sadness can overtake you. However, If you can stay in the moment, neither drifting to the past nor skipping to the future, I find that this moment, this second, minute or hour is tolerable and perhaps even enjoyable.

If you just stop for a moment and ponder, How am I feeling at this exact moment?  Is this exact moment stressfulCould I tolerate this moment another second? If The answer is NO, then the practice of mindfulness will help you. 

Now, if it were possible to think about this moment and only this moment, with no whirling thoughts of the past, no fears for the future, wouldn’t that be a relief? Of course it would, and that’s where the practice of Colouring for mindfulness comes into its own.

Get Lost

Colouring helps us to to get lost in time as we focus on the minute details of attending to our Colouring. There’s no time to dwell on the past or worry about the future. All you have to think about is this exact moment. You are choosing your colours and deciding where to place apply them. When you are in the mindful state- or bliss state, your try not to venture beyond the guidelines of the drawing to keep things neat and beautiful. As you colour, you see before your eyes something the wonder and beauty of what you are creating, and in anticipation, the finished result joyfully awaits you.

You might have noticed that many varieties of adult colouring books have made their way onto the market. These colouring books aim to look for mental stimulation, meditation, and mindfulness. My favourite types are the ones with intricate, pretty patterns, as I find they help me be the most mindful. I eventually laminate them and make a divider for my planner. I have also have made planner covers from my colouring projects. One day I will have a go at turning my colour creations into a picture that I can frame, and I may do this soon. Your creations do not have to sit inside the colouring book, gathering dust. They can be used for you to admire and others to appreciate for years to come. They may also give you a sense of calmness as you look at them because it reminds you of the calmness and joy of creating it. I have found that the very act of Creating brings healing to my mind. The fact that I have to keep refocusing my mind and changing colours makes it easier to keep my mind on the present moment and deter it from veering off elsewhere.

If Colouring seems like something you want to try, set aside time to sit down in a quiet place and do some colouring. Just commit to 10 mins at first, then increase it in each session. Soon you will find the time goes far too quickly, and you want to stay on the page. It really does bring the mind into full engagement with the activity. Because your mind becomes calm and relaxed, your body will also be, allowing you to unwind and de-stress.

To help get your started with Colouring for the healing of worries, loss, and past hurts. I am offering a FREE Book Mark for you to colour. Send me your email and I will send you Your Book Mark on PDF.

When your receive my email, simply Down load the PDF file then Just copy and paste and print our onto card. If you print it on regular paper when you have finished your colouring laminate it so its strong for use.

Thank you for visiting me here, I hope this post was helpful. Did you enjoy it? Then please like, subscribe or  leave a comment with any questions you may have! If feel you would like further support, please contact me.

Details of How to get in touch with me is found in the

top menu on my home page.

 HEAD OVER TO YOU TUBE AND CATCH UP WITH MY VIDEOS and I will see you in my next blog post!

Paula Rose Parish

How mindfulness Empowers You to accept lifestyle changes – 3 simple ways to self soothe.

How are you feeling about making plans as the COVID restrictions ease? For me, I’ve got excited about catching up in real life with the people who I love. Trying to maintain relationships online just isn’t the same and sometimes can be detrimental. But once I began to book a few things into my diary, I started to feel a cloud of depression creeping in on me. My mind whirled- now I have to make yet another lifestyle change. Now I have to learn anew how to manage a new lifestyle with actual physical people in it, not just faces on a screen or a disembodied voice on the telephone. Like me, you might be meeting these challenges with a looming overwhelming feeling , and no one would blame you, especially for us who live alone and have been living a shut-in lifestyle for over the past year. It took months for me to adapt to my new ‘shut in’ lifestyle. Contemplating months of aloneness and possible loneliness shook me to the core. I fought back with tears, anger then eventually docile acceptance. If you are interested in reading about my experience of how the practice of mindfulness empowers You to accept lifestyle changes – Keep Reading!

I finally adapted very well to my new lifestyle and found various ways to keep myself productively busy and happy. However, now the prospect of getting back to ‘normal’ causes butterflies in my stomach and overwhelms my happiness. I am nervous about facing yet another lifestyle change!

In this post, I want to share how I use mindfulness to help me through the overwhelm that a lifestyle change can bring. I share with you how I use colouring to help me through the overwhelm that each day can bring. This is not the whole story but a snippet from my new book about Holistic Living which features mindfulness. I am in process of writing it and will published and made available  to you later in the year – so keep a look out for that!

·       Self-soothing mindfully 

Lifestyle changes can cause a backlog of overwhelming tasks to face. We feel overwhelmed one, day carry it over to the next and then carry that over to the next day or week. Before long, we have a backlog and run into all kinds of complications. We aren’t robots; we need time and space to wind down; we need to be soothed regularly. Living alone has advantages and disadvantages. One of the disadvantages is that I have no one to soothe me after a horrible day so I can relax. I have no one to soothe my brow, massage my shoulders or feet. There is no voice of comfort or encouragement to help me through a difficult situation. With living alone, we must learn how to do all of the above ourselves. Here are a few ways that I have found to soothe myself.

Face massager: I have a small handheld face massager that I run all over my face. It soothes a headache in my temples and feels amazing comforting as I slowly run it over my face. It has the added benefit of strengthening facial muscles and decreasing fine lines.

Hot wheat bag: I have Reynard’s disease and feel the cold bitterly. I put a wheat bag in the microwave for 3mins. When I am tired and strung out, I simply put my warm wheat bag on my shoulders, feet or hands- anywhere I need it to soothe my weariness away. 

Cool gel bag: you may be someone who prefers the ‘cool’ approach rather than warm If this is the case, a cold gel bag is a tool for you to soothe your weariness away. 

I do many other things to self soothe, which I will share with you in another post.

·       Mediation- a mindful practice

Mediation works wonders during a lifestyle change! With change comes challenges that threaten to overwhelm us. Just taking 10 mins alone in meditation gives you a breather and can help you refocus on what is ahead of you. Mediation can help you sort your priorities and help you to see your situation more clearly. When your mind is rested and renewed, so is your focus and intention. 

·       Slow down and become mindful.

You are not a robot, so stop expecting yourself to run infinitely on an automatic pilot. Throughout our day, we encounter many changes, some of them we create, but at other times circumstance or other people create change for us. This all has a bearing on the ‘style’ of our day. I tend to set far too many daily goals. I use my computer for everything I do, and I expect things to run smoothly. But the truth is that my workload rarely runs without a hitch. There are many times more than I would lie when my computer is low. The broadband network might be overloaded, and the downloads or uploads take forever. This ties my computer up, and all I can do is patiently wait. There are times when my computer has crashed for no apparent reason. I use Dragon text to speech as it helps with my dyslexia, and to my frustration, it often refuses to open. Then I must take time out to make a call to customer service. All this puts a spanner in the works taking me away from my precious work schedule. By the end of the day, I go to bed feeling defeated, not having addressed most of my tasks which must be laid over till the next day. I looked hard and long at this recurring problem and decided to approach it prayerfully but also mindfully.

How did I approach this mindfully? I began each new task far slower than usual. I intensely focused on the task at hand and tried to resist the temptation to multitask. I did my best not to call to mind all the other tasks waiting for me, so I could concentrate on what was at hand. When my computer decided not to play ball, being in the mindful mode, I felt an inner calm and dealt with it in peace rather than panic. Being mindful helps me to roll with the wanted and unwanted changes in the course of my day. Slowing down and being ‘mindful’ of each task helps me to be one with that task achieving far more in less time.

Allowing myself to approach my lifestyle changes mindfully brings healing like no other and the courage and strength to help me today. The Lord tells us to be strong and of good courage. And it seems to me that God leaves it to us to discover how to be a solid and courageous person. I have found that Practicing mindfulness enables me to achieve what I want to and also ‘be’ the person that I aspire to.

Thank you for visiting me here, I hope this post was helpful. Please like, subscribe or like and feel free to leave a comment with any questions!

 If feel you would like further support, please contact me. Details of How to get in touch with me is found in the top menu on my home page.

 HEAD OVER TO YOU TUBE and catch up with my latest VIDEOS and I see you in my next blog post!

Paula Rose Parish

How to Grow, and Improve Self Awareness with Mindfulness and Meditation

Change of circumstance and then learning new ways of doing things is terrifying and leave me feeling vulnerable. Due to the pandemic, I had to move my work and my whole life online to survive. I don’t really want to do it as I am a face-to-face kind of girl. I avoided it for the longest time, but when push came to shove, I had to bite the bullet and learn new things about the online world, which up to them, was an enigma to me. Now nine months in the adventure, I still get the jitters from time to time because I am still not wholly comfortable. However, if I keep going consistently, I know I will begin to enjoy the process and grow as a person.

And you dear Reader, in what ways can you learn, grow, and improve? What choices can you make to push past your comfort zone, act, and strive towards your best self while practising self-care?

In this post I want to share with you how you can grow and improve self awareness. This is not the whole story but a snippet from my new book about Holistic Living which features mindfulness and issues around mental health. I am in process of writing it. It will be published and made available to you later in the year – so keep a look out for that!

To help me to work through the’ scariness’ of learning things new, I found that I care for myself through living holistically, which is basically listening to my body, asking for God’s wisdom, and doing things to serve my growth, wins hands down every time. 

Sometimes though, we must push ourselves to leave our comfort zone, take that new job position, travel someplace new, or speak in front of a crowd. Take opportunities for personal growth and development.

Why mindfulness & meditation?

One of the most important aspects of holistic living is being present in the ‘here and now. To be focused and aware in the moment is of utmost benefit to mind, body, and spirit. That’s something I struggle with, and I often find myself looking towards the future or allowing my mind to pick up unnecessarily signals instead of being present in the moment. Despite the struggles, learning the practice of mindfulness and Christian meditation have made such a huge difference in my life. In another post, I will outline ‘how’ I practise mediation in my daily life, so keep watching out for that.

Mindfulness helps to bring awareness to my body, my emotions, and my thoughts. It helps me feel grounded, connected to the universe, and calm. I know it can be intimidating and challenging to start a mindfulness practice, but I encourage you to try out some guided meditations to start out.

If you struggle to make self-care a priority, check out my courses which will be available in Summer of 2021.

 Where do you spend your energy?

Your time and energy are precious, and you shouldn’t waste it on things that don’t matter. Are you spending hours watching TV or scrolling on social media every day? Are you allowing minor inconveniences to ruin your entire day? Are you getting stressed out about things you can’t control? Be aware of where you place your energy and where and what you give your attention to. 

So, do what to do? To start with, do what feels most important to you, and focus on those things. The ‘feeling’ part of you is your spirit- your inner core being. Allow that to guide you as you begin to learn to care for yourself. 

Practising self-care by way of a holistic lifestyle might mean different things to different people. There is no one “right” way to live a holistic lifestyle, as long you are caring for your entire self; mind, body, and spirit (soul).

Try to be mindful of how the different parts of your life interact. Be intentional about your choices every day, having your well-being in the uppermost part of your thoughts.

I hope this short article has helped to get you started on the journey of a lifetime. It’s a journey on which your life may depend as you practice self-care.  

Thank you for visiting me here. Please like, subscribe and free to leave a comment with any questions!

 If feel you would like further support, please contact me. Details of How to get in touch with me is found in the top menu on my home page.

My Blog posts are for your encouragement.

 HEAD OVER TO YOU TUBE AND CATCH UP WITH MY VIDEOS and

I will see you in my next blog post!

Paula Rose Parish