Three Steps to learn to love yourself and why you should.

Your relationship with yourself is one of the most important relationships you have. So the first thing I want you to do is to spend some time thinking about what you actually think about yourself – write it down.

Looking at your list, if you are finding that you really don’t love yourself, below is a couple of tips to help you to start that all-important relationship with yourself. This month, there will be more blogs to follow with more tips.

  1. Forgive Yourself

Forgiveness means that you accept what has happened and your behavior and be willing to move past it and move on with your life without worrying about things that cannot be changed. As a therapist, I learned this approach to self-forgiveness, which is also the Biblical way to forgiveness. The below method suggests that four key actions can help you to forgive yourself.

The 4 R’s of Self-Forgiveness

  1. Responsibility
  2. Remorse
  3. Restoration
  4. Renewal

Forgiving yourself is beneficial for any good mental, physical and relationship health. 

Letting go and offering yourself forgiveness can help boost your feelings of wellness and improve your self-confidence. The act of forgiveness can also positively impact your physical health. Have you heard the expression “he’s eaten up with hate”? Science and the Bible tell us that unforgiveness can manifest itself negatively in our physical bodies. If we can’t forgive ourselves, then it will be impossible to forgive others impacting our relationships. 

  1. Remind Yourself – No more People Pleasing. 

Have you heard the expression keep your opinions to yourself? Well. That’s the philosophy I was brought up with, as were many of my generations. As a result, I became fearful of what others thought of me. To this end, I expressed no personal opinion of my own in case someone did not agree with me, and I would upset them. To avoid upset, I learned to keep my opinions to myself. Unfortunately, this led me to the weakness of people-pleasing. The problem with this approach is that one forgets what is important in their own life and tends to live ‘through’ other people’s experiences, which I sad.

I began to observe the same behaviors in others and saw what resulted from their lives down the track. Therefore, I decided that I would no longer be a people pleaser and that my opinion does matter. After a struggle of years, much prayer, sweat, and tears, I finally rid myself of such behavior and began to value myself. In valuing myself, I was able to love myself. 

  1. Do Things That Make you Happy.

Someone once said, ‘you were not born to live to just pay the bills then die’.

No, you are more highly valued than that!

If you are happy, you will be more productive, motivated, and fulfilled. So when the alarm sounds, you will bounce out of bed in the morning, ready to begin ad brand new day with its challenges. However, if you are unhappy, you’ll be more likely to pull the covers over your head when the alarm sounds because you just can’t face your day.

If you are happy within yourself, it will become self-evident. You’ll automatically spread positivity, love, and joy, and Others will notice and want to be around you. After all, who wants to cozy up to a grump?

So, think about what makes you happy and ensure you engage with those things regularly. Don’t get so busy that that provides no time to do the things you enjoy. Maintaining happiness takes effort because it is a state of mind, and then doing those things that make you happy will reinforce that attitude.

Thank you for visiting me here; I hope this post was helpful. 

If it was, please follow this blog, you’ll find a button on the lower bottom right and leave a comment with any questions or prayer requests. Also, head over to my other blog www.moonrosemindfulnes.com for lifestyle tips and details of my Course. 

Virtual hugs, I look forward to your visit to my next blog post!

 Paula Rose Parish

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How to Stop Self-sabotaging and learn how to truly Love Yourself.

In my previous blog, I gave you some tips on self-love and why you should love yourself. Here are some further thoughts to help you to start loving and appreciating yourself.

It is vital to learn about your false beliefs about yourself. Learning about yourself can be a terrifying experience but also a deep and compassionate process of exploration. 

It would help if you learned what your values are because it reflects upon your behaviour. To do this, dig deep into your feelings and ask- “What am I thinking that’s causing self-sabotage or pain to myself?” Allow the answer to come from deep inside your soul. Dig deep into your intuition and true feelings.

Once you understand what you’re thinking and feeling, think about the fears and false beliefs that lead you to sabotage or pain.

Listen to your self-talk. What are you saying to yourself? What are others saying, and you are buying into it? What are the negative thoughts and actions against yourself? Write it all down. If you don’t your will forget what you discovered or the idea my be distorted.

All of us have the unconscious habit of keeping a running dialogue with ourselves throughout the day. Once you are fully aware that you do this, you have the opportunity to change the tune- create well habits and fill your day with positive self-talk. 

Instead of continuing a pattern of negative self-talk, be committed to breaking the cycle, research and learn how to change your outlook on life with positive thoughts that will increase your self-esteem. 

Self-exploration like this will take time, be patient with yourself and keep on keeping on- don’t give up. In time, maybe sooner than you think, you will detect that inner dialogue, so then you can correct and control it.

When your self-esteem is healthy, loving yourself will come naturally. 

Thank you for visiting me here; I hope this post was helpful.

If it was, please follow this blog you’ll find a button on the lower bottom right and leave a comment with any questions or prayer requests. Also head over to my other blog www.moonrosemindfulnes.com for lifestyle tips and details of my Course.  

Virtual hugs, I look forward to your visit to my next blog post!

 Paula Rose Parish